You’re problem solving skills for life is useless. But, you’re stubborn. How can this be? “I’ve always done it this way. I’m not at fault. It’s my family. It’s the pastor. It’s technology. It’s the government. It’s the media.” Then five years later, you realize that it’s YOU. You had an epiphany and now realize that you’re the cause of your problems. Perhaps you allowed people to exploit your weaknesses for their gains and not yours. These weaknesses affected your interactions with others and resulted in unwanted and negative outcomes. But, if you reframe these experiences you will recognize that positive feedback is encased in the negativity to help steer the mind into a positive direction that would afford you love, peace, and prosperity.
Let me give you a few examples that you may relate to. It’s hard for you to get to the point quickly and effectively. The manager never promotes you, but hires a colleague who speaks with a powerful voice of certainty and he/she takes decisive action in company matters; your mother manipulates you with the silent treatment and a range of passive aggressive behavior to get you to yield to her demands. Your haircut is predictable and has been this way since you were in college. Why experiment with a new hairstyle? What if the new cut makes you look wack? Your head looks too big? Your friends might not like the style? What if you have to abandon your long time barber to get one who’s competent in the hairstyle?
We all get to this point in life. Will you be the same ol person or someone new?
Here are five tips to chisel yourself into a new person.
WARNING THIS ISN’T FOR THE OMNISCIENT!!!
1. Read– The information you gather from family is limited and typically fear based. It keeps you in a state of stagnation because of the disempowering messages you receive. They can’t achieve, so they want you to be a loser as well. So they’ll tend to focus on what can’t be done and say the all important hackneyed expression ‘it can only be done this way’. Look at their lives and see if their advice has lead them to success. If not, then toss it. Their existence is based on complaining and blaming. Read books to stimulate the mind and help transform you into a solution oriented person. Indulge in a vastness of books. The stories, concepts, and ideas will push your mental horizon into prosperity and give you the opportunity to assimilate these ideas to form a new way of thinking.
2. Think Like A Scientist– You must continue to experiment with life. Think of new ways to reach an intended result. The first few solutions may be duds, but keep going. Don’t give up. Remove or add behaviors that have led to past success or failure. If you’re too stressed or tired to think of beneficial or detrimental conduct that has affected you, then take a nap. Sleeping solves problems. Still, you can incorporate other people’s knowledge with yours. Sometimes their vital piece of information is what you needed to succeed.
3. Disengage From Poisonous Foods– Eat as many fresh fruits, vegetables, and meats that you can. A balanced diet equals a balanced mind. If you’re a vegetarian or vegan focus on meatless alternatives such as fish. I recommend doing your own research to find the best option. Stay away from processed foods, fast foods, cookies, potato chips and candies. These foods contribute to obesity and an unhealthy mindset. When was the last time you felt great after you ate junk food? Ok, you might get a brief surge of energy, but then your sugar level crashes. Healthy foods can sustain you for longer periods and beautifies the hair, skin and nails which makes you sexier. It’s not easy, but you can do it.
4. Visualize and Write– List everything you want. Remember IT’S WHAT YOU WANT. Not anyone else. Life doesn’t have a reset button. Once it’s gone, it’s gone. There’s always something that makes you smile. You might be going through a crisis, but you always dreamt of a particular lifestyle. It’s attainable; don’t let your circumstances stop you from dreaming and making plans for a better tomorrow. Write it down. Take Action. It will happen. Believe.
5. Listen To Podcasts and Surround Yourself with Positive People– There’s amazing information online that can boost your spirits to help you become a self actualized being. I don’t care if you’re having the worst day in ten years or haven’t won anything in 20 years. Entrepreneurs, Motivational Speakers, Physicists or anyone who has overcame tremendous hardships to become successful can give you hope and knowledge to help you on your journey. They have a can do spirit that’s infectious and pushes you to take on life with an assertive and cheerful manner. Then you will begin to seek positive alliances. You don’t have the time or energy to deal with negative people. Disempowering people are cancerous. They complain and drain. Empowering folks encourage you to take the leap into the unknown. They use testimonials to push you forward not to stop you from chasing your dreams. They’re genuinely happy for your success and progress.
These tips can be overwhelming, but I suggest you slowly consume the information and take a slow pace in gradually changing yourself into a new person. Don’t be impatient. As, my ex hairbraider said ‘Rome Wasn’t Built In A Day’.
Written By: Mansu Edwards